ic inbox;

[madhatted]

[The voice that of the message is probably not the one you expect. And if you're Gilbert, probably causes traumatic flashbacks. It's certainly Break's voice, but a bit high pitched and more comical...]

Hello, this is Emily! You're obviously an idiot who can't even come see someone in person if it's important, but I'll take pity on you anyways. Leave a message and I'll tell the wonderful and charming Mr. Break about it if it's worth it!

[are you sure you even want to leave a message now]

Comments

[madhatted]

[ It's quickly back to strange comments with Cecil, and Break glances his way briefly at the comment on Carlos's hair, of all things, but he keeps his expression respectful. It's not a surprise, in a way, because Break had almost expected this level of cruelty from Yao, but having confirmation of it is frightening. It's frightening in a very selfish way, because hearing this from Cecil, he knows the same could be done to Sharon, Reim, or anyone else he cared about in a moment. ]

Ha... How very cruel of them.

[ His laugh is humorless and soft, and he shakes his head. ]

I had suspected they may do as much. Not so specific, but when I signed the contract, I did get the impression at how much failure wasn't tolerated. It is— [ But he cuts himself off there, since he realizes he's getting to analytical about it. There's a pause where the tapping of his cane is the only sound, but he adds, quietly, ]

For what it's worth, I am sorry.

[weirdatlast]

I had not expected it. I had thought that since he was in Night Vale, he would be safe. I had expected to see him one day, as unexpectedly and at random as all the rest seem to be brought or not brought to us here. ...I had not expected them to bring my Carlos to me just to take him away.

[ He knows better now. Now that it is too late. They are not only cruel. They are meaninglessly cruel. They are intelligently cruel. As cruel and unpredictable as a child. ]

But thank you. Anyway.

I had said I would tell you, so. ...I'm not sure how it will help you to know. But I hope it does. I hope you learn from what I have lost and hope to some day get back. I hope you learn from what you have not lost, so that you never feel the same.

[madhatted]

[ He nods, slowly and solemnly, because in the same situation, the amount of people he cares about that aren't already here is a terribly small pool. In fact, it could only be the rest of the Rainsworths, Sharon's mother and grandmother, and that brings an icy fear to his heart. It certainly reinforces how he cannot fail, and it is... cruel. It's not that it's cruel to him, necessarily, because that was why he had signed this contract at all. He could withstand the pain and blood on his hands, because that was familiar to him.

But he had given this burden to Sharon, too, without fully thinking about it. That is what will keep him in line, and he realizes how ingenious it is on Yao's part. The solemn look turns to a bitter smile, and Break laughs as he shakes his head. It's a humorless laugh, and for now, with this realization on his shoulders, he looks old and tired. ]

It does help me. It makes it clear that I cannot fail, no matter what they ask. So I suppose that is better to know now, so that I can serve them without faltering. I suppose these contracts do tend to work that way, so I should have known better.

[ Which makes it sound like he's had a contract before, though he's more thinking aloud than paying attention to what he's saying. ]

Well, in any case, we have our work cut out for us, don't we?

[weirdatlast]

[ He notices, but doesn't ask. After all, he worked for a terrible and unknowable god-corporation in his home of Night Vale. He wouldn't be at all surprised if he wasn't the only one repeating their history here. ] We do, yes. We are both of us in over our heads.

All that's left is to lift our chins, and try not to drown.

[madhatted]

I think drowning would be preferable at this point.

[ He says it simply, but without humor, because even then, death isn't exactly a release either. It was a perfect contract, in that way, and Break could almost admire it in how perfect and terrible it was. He heaves a sigh, then reaches up under his bangs to massage at the corner of his missing eye. Even though it hasn't hurt in a long, long time, it's something of a habit by now. ]

Did anything happen to Yuuki, by the way?

[weirdatlast]

[ It was a nice distraction, for a moment, imaging what drowning must be like, realizing it's possible here in Haven, adding it to his list of Deaths to Try. But then Break mentions her. And Cecil stops walking before he remembers to start again. ]

Yes. Yes, Yuuki was punished also. They had no powers, there in that office. They brought Zero in, the one she cares most about. They handed me a knife, then, and told me to kill him.

That was the punishment, to her.

[madhatted]

[ There's another low, thoughtful hum from Break, because that's worrying too, though in lines with his suspicions. He stops with Cecil and brings a hand to his chin in thought, but his gaze stays elsewhere. He had discussed this possibility with both Reim and Gilbert, what information was too much to share by their standards, and it seems that he's at least gotten something of an answer, now. It's more leeway in terms of information than he was expecting, but also exactly what he'd expect in terms of the punishment.

Truly, these contracts weren't just for one. It was his name on the contract, but in signing it, he had entangled anyone he had ever cared about. It was almost impossible to think of anything having that amount of power, since not even the Abyss could manage this, but his proof was right here. ]

It's harsh, but... I suppose it's not unexpected, unfortunately.

[ He looks to Cecil, and if Break were friendlier to Cecil, he might soften his words, but no such luck. ]

She would have faced punishment regardless, I'm sure. The way she chose to spread the information was idiotic, considering these were devices given to us by the Corporation, but... I suppose she knows that, now.

[weirdatlast]

She did what she thought was best. [ Cecil responds a little petulantly because, uh, that's his not-girlfriend you're talking about, okay. ]

It was not a smart thing to do. Not saying those things on the network, not taking the information in the way she did from someone like me. But whether it was smart or not, whether she knew it... I'm not sure her mind would have been changed.

She is very brave. Even as I was told to kill him, she was telling us both, "We can beat them. We should not give up."

[madhatted]

[ Break notes that petulant tone and is honestly a bit surprised by it, but he just shakes his head. ]

You're mistaking bravery for recklessness. It's not brave to go about things as she does. [ He sighs, then figures this is as good of a time as any to bring it up, ] For an example not related to this, somehow, she came across the knowledge that I work for Yao, which is curious considering only you and my closest of friends know. It is reckless for her to approach one of them thinking that she was warning them, because of course, this information got back to me.

[ Pointedly, ] Had things proceeded differently, I would have had to eliminate her, Cecil. So it's reckless for her to throw around her weight, so to speak, then be ignorant or oblivious to its consequences. The well included. It is no longer bravery to speak nice words when it is your own fault to have been there in the first place.

[weirdatlast]

Sometimes bravery and recklessness are the same thing.

We are not brave men, you and I. We know what is a reckless act before it happens, and we never do it. Because it is reckless. Because we would be caught. Because we know what being caught means.

Yuuki was reckless. She did not know what that meant, but she knew it meant something. And when she was faced with punishment, she tried still to do what was reckless.

I stopped her. I had her Zero stop her, because I am not a brave man, and neither is he. Because we are not reckless men. But Yuuki? Yuuki fought. Even powerless. Even knowing the consequences. She tried. She tried, and she tried to help us also, knowing what we are.

Yuuki is nothing less than brave.

[madhatted]

I disagree.

[ He disagrees in a way that he would never express willingly, because his past is something that Break keeps well guarded. But recklessness in the face of consequences you knew would only be terrible, it would never be brave to him. When he was a younger man, he had been reckless in this way, refused anything to the contrary, because he had to try. That was the way Kevin Regnard had felt.

And 116 innocent people had died for it. He had killed them purposefully, one by one, because even in the face of the impossible, if he only fought and tried, then something would come of it, surely. And Break had forgotten the lesson he had learned from this, and here he was again.

Recklessness was not brave. It was selfish, ultimately, and detestable. But he keeps the extent of how much he hates it to himself, because he would never explain why of his own volition. But in comparison to the serious, cold way he spoke a moment ago, his voice is suddenly light and cheery. ]

Bu~t at the same time, who knows~! Perhaps she's the noble heroine that will save us all from out plight, hm~? We can disagree about what's brave or not, but being effective doesn't necessarily require bravery! Perhaps just as much recklessness as you can muster.

[weirdatlast]

[ Cecil notices the shift, and it's hard not to, knowing Break as he does, in the context he does. And he's reminded vaguely of when Break had laughed that one time, after Sharon was laying between them dead.

It was a lie, though, what Cecil had said before. He and Break are brave men. They are not brave like Yuuki, but they are. In their own ways. ]

We'll see.